How long do we hang on to the bad things that happened in our lives? Do we ever forget those things or do we say we do but it somehow lingers in the back of our minds. Do we move on with our lives and just not worry about it anymore? But then there are times when you talk to someone about it and the … Continue reading let it go…
I have been though countless episodes since I’ve been diagnosed and in the end, I just move on with life as if nothing happened. I don’t think I’ve ever really analyzed an episode after it had happened. Is it better that I don’t? or should I have sat down and talked about it? I don’t think it matters now, does it? It’s okay, I had … Continue reading as if nothing happened
Separate, sifting through the wreckageI can’t concentrateSearching for a message In the fear and painBroken down and waitingFor the chance to feel alive Now in my remainsAre promises that never cameSet the silence freeTo wash away the worst of me Come apartFalling in the cracksOf every broken heartDigging through the wreckage Of your disregardSinking down and waitingFor the chance to feel alive Now in my … Continue reading In my remains by Linkin Park
Growing up, I was not allowed to show or express any of my feelings. The more I did, the more I would get in trouble. Of course we all know, that leads to bottling up of emotions and then becoming a ticking time bomb of when you are going to explode when you couldn’t take it anymore. My sister and brother had no problem saying … Continue reading I can’t express my feelings
Being in recovery mode for the past few weeks and have nothing to do but binge watch TV show and think endlessly about everything. The one thing that has been running around in my mind is that certain people become a part of your life and then at some point that comes to an end. When I was little, I grew up with my cousins. … Continue reading Phases of life
This is a late post because I’ve been busy with work. I’ve been really good about bringing my lunch to work and not eating out, that goes for dinner too. So one day I decided to get In-N-Out for dinner on a Friday evening. Hey, I deserve it right? So I got a double double with grilled onions, extra crispy fries and a coke. Took … Continue reading always take your psych meds!
I just started back on keto on Monday. So far it’s been okay. Today I only had a small turkey burger for lunch and I was still hungry. I decided to go down the street to where my company usually gets our luncheon sandwiches from and get one for myself. When I got down there, the line was obscenely long, I would have never made … Continue reading Strawberries and Granola
So I just hired a housekeeper. Mind you I live in a one bedroom apartment. I’m not a neat freak but I’m not a slob either. I know, I know. Such a small living space to hire a cleaning lady, I just really hate cleaning. My place really isn’t that messy or dirty, just clutter here and there and I just don’t clean as much … Continue reading Organized Chaos
All this time, I’ve been dealing with my mental illness on my own, maybe with the help of my best friend and sometimes a therapist, but mainly on my own. I just went through another major depressive episode and it lasted for over a month and resulted in changes on my medication. I talk about it with certain people and I always get the same … Continue reading how do you speak when you can’t speak?
I don’t know if it’s the meds or the illness that’s causing the mind to slow down or have I always been slow to process things? I’ve noticed it for some time now, I have a hard time processing difficult situations. I just had a depressive episode and while myself and my body are over it, my mind is still processing it. I mean it’s … Continue reading time to process