Going backwards

I feel like I have to re-examine myself as to what happened in the past, while I was trying to figure out how to deal with my mental illness, why things are the way they are now. I keep wondering if I should go back and read through my journals that I told myself I would never open again. Afraid that it might be a … Continue reading Going backwards

I wish my love life was a Filipino love story

I’ve been stuck at home recovering from surgery for about a few weeks now and I have run out of things to watch. I was surfing through Amazon Prime movies for something to watch and a Filipino movie came up. Filipino movies are mushy, corny love stories where one is fighting for the other to make the relationship work and they are definitely tear jerkers. … Continue reading I wish my love life was a Filipino love story

Affection

I’ve been single for a very long time now. Dated here and there but no relationship significant enough to have any real affection involved. What is affection? Definition of affection – a gentle feeling of fondness or liking. The only affection I give is to my pets and my family members, other than that, the feeling isn’t there. I’ve been chatting with this one guy … Continue reading Affection

Can you create love out of thin air?

So I’ve been doing the dating scene for quite some time now and I’ve noticed something… Of all the guys I’ve had first and/or second dates with, I don’t know if it’s me or what, but for some reason they seem to fall hard and fast and so when I tell them that it’s not going to work, they are completely devastated and I’ve, and … Continue reading Can you create love out of thin air?

in love’s words

If you were to sum yourself up in words of love, what would it say? I have a calendar on my desk that was given to me, “Whiskey words & a shovel,” that gives short sayings, if I am describing that correctly. Quotes maybe? Anyway today’s was this: just stay.I’m just a fucked-up loversearching for someone whowill understand my scarsand never leave my side I … Continue reading in love’s words

Wish me luck! “Wink”

So the last time I said anything about relationships, I said I didn’t want to be in one and I just wanted a companion and leave everything up to the universe. Well that lasted for a good few months. I sit here and I think, if I really leave it up to the universe and fate or destiny, nothing will ever happen because I never … Continue reading Wish me luck! “Wink”

Only the Lonely

As much as I love doing things on my own, not having to worry about anyone else at all, it really does get lonely. I know I’ve said it time and time again, I’m lonely. This past weekend I went up to the Sequoia National Park. Did some hiking, climbed a rock, more hiking, saw ginormous trees and more hiking before a four hour drive … Continue reading Only the Lonely