Better late than never

A lot of good things have been happening and I have my surgery to thank for that. I feel like it’s been a month, if not more, since my surgery when it has only been three weeks. The last three weeks has really been a blessing considering everything that I have gone through.

The first week I was home, my mom stayed with me and slept on my couch the entire week. She cleaned my apartment from the inside out, did my laundry, walked my dog, feed my pets and cook me all the delicious food that I have been missing out on since she lives farther away. At first it was driving me crazy! Really, my mom drives me crazy. I’m sure I’m not the only one. I can only spend a few days with her at best and then it starts to get iffy. So, with her doing the laundry and putting things away drove me crazy. I know, I know, she doesn’t know where things go. She has never really spent time in my apartment and she doesn’t know how I like things. And then there was so much food, and I don’t eat that much to begin with, a lot of it went to waste. I felt so bad. Then more time has passed and things got easier and I got used to her being around. She was always there for about two weeks straight that my dog Mochi was starting to like my mom more than me and yes I was getting jealous. What could I do? I couldn’t walk at Mochi’s pace yet. At the same time, there were nights where we would eat dinner and have long talks and I get to know my mom a little more.

Then there is my dad. My dad comes about every other day? Sometimes two to three days in a row. It was nice because then I would be having dinner with both my mom and my dad. I do miss that very much. As I got better, my mom wouldn’t come as often but my dad would still visit. He would stay for about a couple of hours or so. We would talk about everything. I told him about my mental illness once before but I didn’t go into detail. One of the nights he was there, we got to talk more seriously about it, like in depth detail. Of course my dad is old fashioned and doesn’t believe in medicine and is a mind over matter type of person but that’s just who he is. I let him talk and tell me his stories about the times he fell into depression himself and the things he did to get out of it. In the end, I didn’t fight with him, I just let him be. This is one battle that I choose not to pick at. Other than that, he would call me every day asking me if I’m okay, how am I doing and if I had food. He would always ask if I needed food. But tonight, I took him out to a nice dinner and I think it will become a monthly thing with us now. He said pick a place to go to next month and I said, we can do this once a month.

Growing up, my parents were never around. We lived in Palmdale back then. My dad worked two jobs, one was in Woodland Hills. We would see him Monday morning before he left for work and then Sunday when he was home from work. My mom is a CPA. I think she worked in Encino when we were little? I can’t remember. My sister was basically our second mom. We didn’t have a baby sitter. It was just my sister, me and my brother. That went on up through high school and when my sister went to college and my brother joined the Air Force. We lived in Stevenson Ranch by then. Don’t get me wrong, we went on family trips once a year, it was just that my parents were busy making ends meet. No harm in that. What I’m trying to say is that we never had a chance to really bond with our parents growing up since they were never around. Me and my siblings grew up to be very independent people. Up until my surgery, I still shut my parents out. I never let anyone get close. Now all of this makes up for it. Better late than never.

A small price to pay for all the good that has happened

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